God is our BEST FRIEND!

"I am unconscious but my heart still beats and my lungs still breathe--yet even that I know is sustained by my Creator. Who can go to sleep tonight and be 100% sure he will wake up in the morning. Not a single person. It is by God's will and power that we see another day." -- stevo :)

last night, i didn't fall asleep too easily either.. but at least last night i wasn't thinking empty thoughts. instead, i had this quote in mind..
and.. it just sparked this whole stimulating..mess..of..greatness haha :) it was all a matter of me sorting out these thoughts and making sense of everything.

God breathes life into all of us each day. He wakes us every morning so we can live another day.. not just "another" day, but a new day! He wakes us so we can all breathe another breath. smile to a stranger. bring someone else joy. say 'i love you' to a family member or friend! have another opportunity and say 'i love you' to God, Himself! have more time to heal open wounds and forgive those who have hurt us. to be inspired by others. to imagine! to dream! &create! and to just..experience being ALIVE.. through Him of course :)

and i mean, isn't that something to look forward to?! isn't the life He gave us something to.. go to sleep and wake up and experience all over again.. more than enough?? it IS!!
but i feel like these days i've just been taking everything for granted. i've been getting really caught up in day-to-day activities. going to class, following my day schedule, studying. i haven't been taking the time to really stop. look around me. and just feel blessed. i know it's really cliche to say, just look around and smell the roses.. but when's the last time i did? when's the last time i laid in bed at the end of a day and thought about all the good things that happened during the day instead of all the small burdens or insecurities i have about tomorrow?

so then i thought, maybe this is what He wanted to reveal to me.. by taking away those what i called, "precious" hours of sleep..to really take the time and do my QTs and think about all the good things that happened today..

in fact, i'll start thinking/writing about my day now! (this entry feels very spontaneous haha)
so i woke up at 715am and got ready to go move my car, which was on gayley, because of street cleaning. and yes, what a hassle.. but i've actually been enjoying these early mornings alone. it's.. very.. quiet. and nice. and today i just felt like visiting my high school so i went to starbucks to get my coffee anddddd.. i see one of my best friend's mom! what a coincidence! so we just sat there and talked about life, friends and our experiences. it was a good breakfast talk :) and thennn i went to my highschool and talked with my coach, talked with my AP Calc teacher <3 hehe i love her! and saw some of my senior friends. and since i have class at 11, soc, and since the parking spots open up at 11 on gayley.. had to go back to UCLA. and even though i was 5 minutes late, and even though i was super hot while power walking to class, class was fun haha right cho, wasn't it fun today?! :/ haha well anyways and then i spent 6 hours in powell studying for psych and even though i outlined some of the wrong section, it's okay! and then went to KCM and that's always fun :)

bottom line, i looked back on what happened today in a good mood and happy state of mind! yayy haha! anyways, back to what my post is really about. i looked up "calvin and hobbes, sleep" up in google and the comic up there is what i found! isn't it perfect?

God is our creator. He's our bestestttt friend! "Things are never quite as scary" when we put our faith in Him. and regarding my "insomnia".. i think just simply knowing He's next to me, embracing me, absorbing all my troubles and worries, bringing me peace.. knowing all of what He has done for me and continues to provide is what will help me sleep better at night..
..&wake up refreshed and anew for a new day!!
(dang i feel so pumped and energized right now)

*edit. omyy! so the last part of my blog got cut off and i freaked out and pressed "back" a bunch of times and I WAS ABLE TO SAVE IT!! God prevails once again hahah<3

sleepless nights

i think i'm a deep sleeper.. actually i KNOW i'm a deep sleeper. my roommate opens the dorm door and would be talking on the phone and turn on the light and i'll still sleep through all of that. send me a text while i'm sleeping? too bad, i won't feel the vibration or hear the alert. call me while i'm sleeping? oops, sorry! not only am i a deep sleeper, but i'm also quick to fall asleep. the moment my head hits the pillow, goodnight world! i pride myself on having the most comfortable dorm bed in all of UCLA.. i have people to prove it too.. for example, my roommate who one day, while getting ready to go to class, just sat on my bed (i have lower bunk) to put on her shoes and decided to lay down for a minute.. and was asleep in a matter of seconds! &&my friends who randomly come in while i'm studying at my desk and attempt studying on my bed. ohnoo, they fall asleep while studying in milliseconds!

sleep is when i'm completely knocked out and in my own zone. i'm utterly unconscious and oblivious to the ongoings of life around me. which is why, these days, i've been so confused on why it's been difficult for me to fall asleep.. and STAY asleep! usually i don't wake up (or sometimes not even wake up) when my alarm rings.. but these days i've been waking up multiple times throughout the night..5am, 8am, etc. and even last night, i was laying in my bed for two HOURS. two hours?!?! usually i'm asleep in two seconds! and it's not that i'm not tired too.. i had been up until 5am the other night writing my paper and went to bed, and that's how my yesterday started..by only having about 5 hours of sleep and then going to a full day's worth of class (11am-5pm). after i studied until 12midnight, i was ready to sleep! but alas, sleep did not come..

so if my body is so tired, why does it seem like my mind is restless and running all over the place? why can't i sleeeeeep?!?

honestly, i'm not that stressed out this quarter. i feel like this quarter has been my favorite so far! my classes are great, i'm enjoying going to class (nerd alert..), and even though the readings are alot, i haven't been behind. okay i guess minus that paper i stayed up until 5am writing.. but even then, i wasn't that stressed and i was actually surprised by what i produced in the end.

but i guess there's uneasiness in my life. i don't know the path i'm taking and alot of things are just up in the air for me maybe? i don't really have a clue for the reason behind my sleepless nights. hum.. i know i probably should have taken those 2 hours for my QT and read my bible. maybe God would have revealed to me the answers.. but instead, i took those 2 hours to think empty thoughts.. to just lay in bed with eyes wide open..

..maybe tonight will be better..

6 months & 17 days..

so instead of writing my history paper right now like i should be doing.. i went through my planner and counted how many days it's been since i've seen my parents last..
SIX MONTHS AND SEVENTEEN DAYS.. :O
i haven't seen them for more than half a year :( and i miss them alot..
..but then i became really happy because right after i counted how many days i HADN'T seen them.. i counted how many days until i DO see them.. which is 28 days :) for my brother's graduation. haha but then they're gonna be leaving again right after to continue their trip.. but stilllll, any amount i get to see them is gooood enough for me!

but basically, the reason i haven't seen my parents is because they're on a one year trip around the world! just for leisure.. just for fun! they planned it so that we rented out a house until the end of summer '08 and so when lease was over, they could leave for their trip. they booked a plane ticket for the weekend of my first week at college. so right after i got settled into my dorm, i spent one last weekend at home and then drove them to the airport.
ah sad sad day. i remember when we were driving to the airport, my mom and i started arguing to the point where i was so frustrated.. actually i don't remember why we started arguing.. it had something to do with luggage. but regardless, it was so trivial.. we were silent for the rest of the way there. but when we finally arrived at the airport and we were saying our goodbyes, we started apologizing to each other. i think i had finally grasped in my mind that this was going to be one of the last moments i see them until a veryvery long time and i didn't want to waste it. so we said our "i love you"s and "i'll miss you"s and that was the last time i saw them in person.

but i'm happy for them :) because they're living the dream! they're just traveling the world, seeing the landmarks, meeting new people, and just spending time with each other. i think my two hopes for them during their trip were.. to become happier and to just grow on a spiritual level with God. i feel like this trip has probably shown them how they are just be so blessed..

ahh!! anyway, i have to cut this blog short. haha need to work on my paperrr.. :/

half post

i'm sad..
..because i don't know how to upload a new template onto my new blogspot :(

but i'm happy because i'm sore from my workouts! i worked out all last week and it made me feel good :) yayy! agh but it's difficult trying to get fit from all the flab i gained in fall/winter quarter in only a matter of a few weeks.

ok well this wasn't a real first post.. it was more of a half post because i'm still trying to get the hang of blogging again. i haven't blogged since middle school!

testinggg 1 2 3!